Brooks’s+Codes+of+Law


 * __ Brooks’s Code of Laws __**
 * If you steal from someone’s house, we steal from you.
 * If you kill someone, we kill you.
 * If you kill the warden of the town, we torcher you and your family till you and your family die.
 * If you broke your leg, we’ll heal you and kill whoever broke your leg.
 * If you steal a horse, we’ll kill you.
 * If you steal anything from us, we kill you.
 * If you suicide, your family suicides.
 * If you burn someone’s house, you and your house die by fire.
 * If you destroy anyone’s house, you will be tortured.
 * If you believe in another religion, you will die.
 * If you steal/do illegal drugs, you head will be chopped off.
 * If you destroy the town, you will be sent to the moon with 2 hours’ worth of oxygen.
 * If you smell bad, you have to sort all 2,837,893 books in the town library.
 * Restaurants need to serve vegetables to customers or they’re fired.
 * Homes need to be made of wood ($2,000 a plank) or tin foil ($100 a sheet) and the warden’s house (me) is made of solid gold and titanium.
 * People cannot farm within 100 miles of my town.
 * Orphans have to sleep in the dust or the streets.
 * Old men and women’s retirement are rich homes (but they’re not rich).